QuikTips by Subject:The Think Space
The Think Space is a plan to help children take responsibility for their own behavioral choices while offering adults a safe and responsible way to remove themselves from the emotional loop of misbehavior. QuikTips Bundles
QuikTips is a series of short, practical articles that feature easy-to-use tools for low-stress child management. Bundled in small packets, and arranged by topic for easy reference. Main Menu
Everything you say to a child either builds him up or tears him down. |
What are QuikTips?QuikTips is a series of short, practical articles, written by Calvin and Carolyn Richert, that feature easy-to-use tools for low-stress child management. All techniques presented meet strict scientific and ethical guidelines and have been carefully "road-tested" for effectiveness in everyday use. Every method is thoroughly positive and, when used as intended, can help children develop skills of self-management, confidence, empathy and the many other positive character qualities needed in becoming well-adjusted, productive adults. Also available for purchase: QuikTips Bundles are pre-printed small packets, arranged by topic for easy reference. Teaching Virtue
Managing Kids Who Interrupt"Mommy, Billy won't give me my doll!" You're on the phone with the doctor and the kids are fussing. You've been expecting this call for days and yet, the kids need your help - right now! What to do? 
Most kids think nothing of interrupting their parents, regardless of the situation. And their parents don't seem to do much to discourage it.
Is there something better?Big brother, Germaine, hurriedly shoves little sister, Allie, right on her "keester" as he makes a beeline for the water fountain. Half angry, half hurt, she screams "bloody murder". Embarrassed, Germaine stops, helps her up, offering a half-hearted apology. To which Allie kindly responds with the usual, "That's okay." 
But wait. Why did she say that? Was it really "OK" that Germaine pushed Allie down? Of course not. But isn't that what she said? Yes, but it's not what she meant. Still, everyone says it. So, why not just use, "That's OK?"
How sweet it is...really!What’s the matter with you?” you ask. “How can a vaccination be ‘sweet’?” 
Tucked behind the pain of vaccinations is a very meaningful principle: even though a medicine is injected at one place, the whole body benefits. And, what does the “Vaccination Principle” have to do with discipline?
"It's My Turn!": Part 1 of 3Your children are playing quietly with their new PlayStation, when four-year- old Artie suddenly screams, "IT'S MY TURN!" Instantly, you figure that his big sister is stretching her turn. After all, she tends to do that. Because Shelly is probably abusing her privilege, you address her first. "SHELLY!" you shout. 
BUT WAIT! Before you "rescue" Artie from his sister's injustice, consider this. If you make a practice of "fixing things" for Artie, how is he ever going to learn to respond to injustice more appropriately?
"But What About Shelly?": Part 2 of 3In last month's article, two children were playing quietly with their new Play Station, when four-year- old Artie suddenly screamed, "IT'S MY TURN!" 
But, instead of immediately correcting Shelly for wrongdoing, their mother followed our suggestion to work first with Artie. Why? Because he needed to learn to respond to injustice with more patience and skill.
"That's Not Fair!": Part 3 of 3
It's a frequent complaint heard from children just barely talking to mouthy teens. They use it as a club, and especially against parents.
Building foundations of integrity: Part 1 of 2
You see it every day. Maybe you have even done it yourself. Your child hurts another child. Wanting to 'teach him a lesson', you firmly direct him to "go apologize". But, is the child 'sorry' in the first place? Think about it. If you tell a child to say "sorry" and he's not, you have just pushed him toward hypocrisy! Is that what you really want to promote in your child?
Building foundations of integrity: Part 2 of 2"We don't mean to do it," I suggested to Brady. "It just happens before we even think about it." "What's that?" he asked. "Promote dishonesty," I answered. 
I was counseling with Brady about his young son who was going through a disturbing phase of deceitful behavior. Dishonesty doesn't just happen. Lots of things influence it, especially the way we guide our children. In fact, we often make being authentic really difficult for them. For example, in Part 1 we listed: |
Member Login
