Introduction to Direction With Dignity
(...formerly "Discipline Without Damage")
To most people, discipline, carries negative connotations and often implies some sort of punishment. The problem is that most of us were raised with the belief that punishment for doing wrong was a necessary part of growing up, so we naturally pass that belief, with its methods and language, on to each new generation.
Without realizing it, we create a fear of telling the truth by lecturing and punishing a child for lying. We reinforce behavior we are trying to discourage when we see a child doing something wrong and immediately say what NOT to do. We scold a child for wrongdoing but his receptors are shut down, so we waste our breath. However, research continues to confirm that negative guidance and punishment are actually poor teachers. Essentially, they direct a child's behavior from a foundation of fear, rather than from a desire to do what is right.
Our culture is so bombarded with negative messages that learning positive ways of thinking and speaking is like learning a whole new language -- especially for parents. Every day, in spite of our best intentions, we enforce these messages by using words like, "No!" or "Not until..." or "Do you want to get hurt?" or "Don't forget..." when we could have said, "Yes..." or "After..." or "What did I say?" or "Remember..."
So, how do we learn to teach our children with positive language? Direction With Dignity is a coordinated system of communication that is both technically sound and user friendly. It offers practical methods of positive communication that can actually produce the results you are seeking.