QuikTips by Subject:The Think Space
The Think Space is a plan to help children take responsibility for their own behavioral choices while offering adults a safe and responsible way to remove themselves from the emotional loop of misbehavior. QuikTips Bundles
QuikTips is a series of short, practical articles that feature easy-to-use tools for low-stress child management. Bundled in small packets, and arranged by topic for easy reference. Main Menu
Everything you say to a child either builds him up or tears him down. |
What are QuikTips?QuikTips is a series of short, practical articles, written by Calvin and Carolyn Richert, that feature easy-to-use tools for low-stress child management. All techniques presented meet strict scientific and ethical guidelines and have been carefully "road-tested" for effectiveness in everyday use. Every method is thoroughly positive and, when used as intended, can help children develop skills of self-management, confidence, empathy and the many other positive character qualities needed in becoming well-adjusted, productive adults. Also available for purchase: QuikTips Bundles are pre-printed small packets, arranged by topic for easy reference. Motivating Children
It's all in the wrapping!"Oh honey, that's wonderful. Look how smart you are!" 
Your three-year-old brings a lovely painting from preschool. You enthusiastically compliment her effort. After all, anybody knows that compliments develop positive self-image. Right?
for focus, sequence, order"Deon, get back to your project!" you demand for the fourth time. He's working with his new Tinker Toys, but he just doesn't finish anything he starts. 
Keeping kids 'on task' can be frustrating, whether at home or at school. Equally challenging is helping kids do their projects in an orderly way.
(Routine – Ritual – Repetition)"But Mommy, I can't do it," whines 4-year-old Ricky as he struggles with tying his shoes. Remembering a famous quote of Henry Ford -- "Whether you think you can or you can't, you are right," -- Mommy wonders what to do. 
No doubt, her son will eventually learn to tie his shoes. Her concern is his quick, “I can’t do it.” The challenge here is her son’s lack of confidence. She knows that confidence will be the centerpiece of Ricky’s success in life. But, how to get there from here.
(What Children Learn Best)
Which is more powerful: what children HEAR or what they SEE? It’s one of those questions that has no perfect answer, but this we do know. If we contradict what we SAY with what we DO, our actions have more influence... every time!
Making your words work... the FIRST time!“Bella, I said stop teasing your sister right now ... I MEAN it!” 
It’s a common practice. After multiple calls or commands are ignored, in desperation, you shout, “...AND I MEAN IT!” Chances are, you get action, but at what cost? Stop and think what you’ve done.
Reboot!
It’s so embarrassing! You’re at a nice luncheon with some friends, and what happens? Your three-year-old goes berserk. First, she screams about her high chair, then complains about her drink, and finishes by scratching her brother’s face. She seems determined to upset you. What to do? Simply, “reboot”! It’s an idea that comes from the computer world. You know the drill: your computer refuses to cooperate – wrong answers, freeze-ups, dead keys. You call technical assistance and they ask, “Have you rebooted the computer?”
Cutting transition stress"I don't WANT to go now!" your three-year-old screams as you grab his hand to leave the park. 
We have noticed that a high percentage of stress between children and adults – maybe as high as 50% – is about changing from one activity to another. Good news. Here's an easy way to make those transitions more graceful. It just needs a bit of forethought and a clock. Here's how it works.
Teaching responsible communication
Evan is angry. He wants his daddy...NOW! His screams have you nearly convinced that he won't survive the next two minutes. Your eight-year-old rudely demands a new pair of shorts - NOW, quick, before supper! Then, when you won't let your five-year-old play in the park with his best friend, he angrily retorts, "You're mean!" So, what do you say to a screaming two-year-old? How do you answer a rude fourth grader? And how do you convince your five-year-old that you are really a kind, caring person? |
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