Tabletime Manners:
“That’s yucky!” | “Can I have more potatoes?” | “Can I go now?”
Do these outbursts sound familiar? Table time can be a real family circus. From kids demanding what they want to starting and leaving when they choose, disorder and chaos are common when it comes to busy families at meal times.
But it doesn’t have to be that way – and shouldn’t be. Here’s why.
- Consider the amount of work and care that goes into many meals. It’s simply disrespectful for children to treat careful preparations with careless criticism and nonchalance.
- While children rightly expect their parents to provide for them, it’s a mistake to allow them to treat what’s provided for them with an attitude of ‘you owe me’.
True, most families teach some basic dignity at the table, including attempts to eat together, offering an occasional blessing, saying ‘thank you’, etc. However, a few other not-so-common courtesies can make a huge difference in children’s attitudes toward this essential part of life.
- Instead of allowing children to just ‘dig in’ when they receive their food, make a practice of asking everyone to wait until all are served.
- Instead of allowing children to call out ‘Can I have…’ when they want more of something, teach them to say, “May I please have more…?” This practice integrates appropriate courtesy right into their requests and maintains a sense of dignity around the table.
- Instead of allowing children to state their disapproval of foods they dislike, require them to say, “I don’t care for that.” This kind of phrase helps them take responsibility for their dislikes and avoids insulting the person who prepared that food.
- Instead of allowing children to leave the table whenever they want, ask them to raise a quiet hand and literally say, “May I please be excused?” In this way you retain leadership and are able to better manage what happens next.
That about does it...for starters! You will find other small and large courtesies that enhance the character of your kids, that is, IF you will discipline yourself to consistently help them be consistent in the use of these not-so-common courtesies.
