The Think Space

The Think Space is a plan to help children take responsibility for their own behavioral choices while offering adults a safe and responsible way to remove themselves from the emotional loop of misbehavior.

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QuikTips Bundles

QuikTips is a series of short, practical articles that feature easy-to-use tools for low-stress child management.

Bundled in small packets, and arranged by topic for easy reference.

Learn more....

Everything you say to a child either builds him up or tears him down.
There is no middle ground.

- Carolyn Richert

What are QuikTips?

QuikTips is a series of short, practical articles, written by Calvin and Carolyn Richert, that feature easy-to-use tools for low-stress child management.

All techniques presented meet strict scientific and ethical guidelines and have been carefully "road-tested" for effectiveness in everyday use. Every method is thoroughly positive and, when used as intended, can help children develop skills of self-management, confidence, empathy and the many other positive character qualities needed in becoming well-adjusted, productive adults.

Also available for purchase: QuikTips Bundles are pre-printed small packets, arranged by topic for easy reference.

Finding Truth W/O Condemning

Why is Johnny Crying?

It happens somewhere every day. Johnny and Susie are playing together when Johnny suddenly starts crying. Susie, trying to look innocent, just sits there and does nothing to help her brother.

Your first response? Either compassion for Johnny and his problem or indignation at Susie's insensitivity.

Regardless which response is right, a likely first comment from an adult might be,

  • "Susie, what did you do to Johnny? " or,

  • "Johnny. What did Susie do to you?"

After all, it's pretty obvious that Susie did something. Johnny wouldn't just start crying for no reason at all.

But wait. What are the chances that either one of those responses will give you any useful information?

  • If Susie DID cause the crying, her answer to, "What did you do to Johnny? " will probably fall short of the truth.

  • If Susie DIDN'T cause the crying, she will feel unfairly accused.

What to do? You can't just stand there and do nothing - like Susie.

Try one of these questions:

  • "Susie, why is Johnny crying? " or,

  • "Susie, what were you doing when Johnny started crying? " or simply,

  • "What happened here?"

Why is Johnny Crying?

Repeated experience tells us that negatively 'loaded' questions tend to generate lies. After all, most children protect their self-images just like adults. They can't describe their feelings as well as we do, but their feelings about themselves are even more fragile than ours.

On the other side, neutral questions that ask for information are far more likely to lead to the true facts about a conflict situation.

Finally, here's another idea that works well for fact finding. When Johnny comes to you complaining that Susie has hurt his arm, try this: while you keep Johnny with you, calmly ask Susie to come to you. Now, with both children there, ask Susie,

  • "Why is Johnny saying you hurt his arm (or whatever)?"

This question, or something similar, is far more likely to lead to a truthful response than the alternative, "Why did you hurt Johnny?"

The bottom line is this. Children are just as sensitive to being blamed for something as adults. We will all be better off if we approach them with the same kind of care we use with the adults in our lives.

And it's all because children are people too!

Our MISSION

To train adults in the use of positive guidance tools that encourage the inner growth of children.

Learning to communicate with and motivate children to make decisions with their heads and hearts.

Our LOGO

The Heart represents the inner child, which is our primary focus.

DWD Logo - Heart with Arrow

The Arrow shows the outward flow of a balanced child’s energy & awareness.

Our TAG LINE

"... from the inside out" defines the foundation of true character development.

OUTSIDE-IN is how almost all adults teach children until they learn the skills of DWD.

Our FOCUS

  • To help children balance the ‘all about me’ syndrome of childhood.
  • To raise children to be authentic at their core instead of superficial.
  • To guide children to use respect as their basis of interaction with others.