Germaine's kind-hearted mother is touched. It's so hard to see her son struggle with disappointment. She would love to let him go, but at what cost?

When it comes to following rules or completing assignments, nothing teaches better than disappointment. Actually, most of us know this. We just don't practice it when the moment arrives. Why?

• Perhaps it's the child's likely cry that restrains us.
• Maybe it's the fear that the child will get angry and retaliate.
• It could be the argument that will surely follow. Whatever the reason, when we fail to let disappointment do its natural work, we pay dearly for being 'nice'.
• The kids assume they will 'get away with' the same poor choices next time.
• They end up disrespecting us. In a word, by being 'nice' in those situations, we 'shoot ourselves in the foot'!

And how do you administer disappointment so that it builds character instead of resentment?

• Make clear guidelines and expectations. Disappointment that comes out of household or school rules avoids resentment that comes out of arbitrary punishment.
• Focus on the future. As a child is denied privileges, always describe the experience as a time to get ready to do better 'next time'.
• Keep a pleasant, but uncompromising attitude. When you show you're upset, the child focuses attention on you instead of on the issue at hand.
• Avoid talking to the child as he suffers his disappointment. Instead, wait until he is settled down and then have a heart-to-heart talk about the issue.

As for Germaine, what do you think he's going to do about his homework tomorrow? You guessed it. His homework will most likely get done because Germaine is learning to prioritize responsibility ahead of privilege.

And just like that, disappointment has built another bit of character into Germaine's life.