Using incentives creatively and safely
"How do you feel about using rewards to help children change behavior?"
The question was to-the-point. But, it actually came from a mother who wanted me to agree that external incentives are a bad thing!
Not that we 'crusade' in favor of rewards, but used appropriately, they can keep life interesting while helping children achieve goals they may not otherwise reach.
Whether you are using rewards to change old habits or to achieve new goals, here are the 10 guidelines we use:
1. Use sparingly - We suggest only one reward-based 'project' at a time per child.
2. Form a workable plan and then explain it carefully and patiently. Clarify that the plan is to help them gain new beneficial goals or achievements.
3. Make it temporary - Set a definite time frame for the plan with specific starting and ending dates. (This will avoid getting into the habit of having to reward a child to do anything and everything.)
4. Make it visual - Show your plan on a calendar or some other graphic means so that the child has a very clear mental picture of the plan.
5. Both in setting up your plan as well as in your ongoing reminders, always focus your words primarily on the new behavior, not on the reward.
6. As you talk about the incentive plan, be sure to point out both the inner and outer benefits of the new behavior.
7. Set up your plan so that the periods of time between payoffs are longer and longer.
8. Gradually increase the value of the reward until a finale is achieved. Of course, the hope is that the new habit being established will have shown the child its own value, which then provides incentive to continue.
9. Always reward effort with abundant 'thanks'. Why? While the new habit is for the good of the child, her cooperation is clearly based in her respect for you.
10. As you approach the conclusion of a particular phase, increasingly emphasize that "A job well done is its own reward".
Diligently follow this plan and you'll find children reaching goals safely while they gradually learn to value their new habits more than the rewards that got them there.
